Food as medicine for our hearts and souls

In my series on motherhood I want to portray the diversity of the motherhood experience and what it means to be a mother now. I’m interested in telling stories through other mamas to give insight into their approach to motherhood, be it their struggles, triumphs, their deepest feelings, how they have evolved and grown, perhaps how they raise their children connected to nature and live with a light footprint or how they approach mothering consciously.

I want to portray the essence of motherhood in every family’s unique language and am evolving this series to now encompass how we nourish and feed ourselves and our families, sharing the hands, earth and hearts that feed us.

Today I am sharing a beautiful thoughts by Danika. She lives in Christchurch, New Zealand with her lovely wee family of four.

All photos by Charlotte, Olive & Pop

It means everything to me to nourish my family, it is one of the most fulfilling and important roles in motherhood to me. A beautiful older woman once spoke to me about how much power we hold as mothers who feed our families, and she is right - we are laying the foundations of our children’s health and relationship with food, and ultimately how they will prioritise nourishment.

Nourishing myself as a mother is something I am really trying to prioritise. My goal for this year was nourishment in all the ways. I think as mums, sometimes self sacrifice is too easy. I’m sure we are all guilty of finishing the dregs left on our child’s plate instead of making something nourishing and beautiful for ourselves as we have done for them. Especially as a breastfeeding māmā, that has given me motivation as what I nourish myself with ultimately is nourishing my youngest too.

Dinner is something I really put a lot of love and thought into, to make something wholesome and nourishing because even if the rest of the day has gone to shit it’s comforting to know that there has been one meal that is full of goodness, vegetables, good quality meat or protein of some kind, nourishing healthy fats - that we will all get to have. I try and prep breakfast the night before, even if it’s just soaking oats to make things a little easier. We talk about food a lot in our home and I try to include my children in the kitchen as much as possible and have done so since they were babies. They help in the vegetable and herb garden a lot and will go and collect things for meals. I think growing our food and giving them shared responsibility in caring for it has really helped to deepen their relationship with the food we eat. We get eggs from my parents free range chickens and sometimes meat from them too. My wish for them is to have an understanding of where their food comes from and an appreciation for the food that nourishes them. We try not to talk about “bad” or “good” food or even “treats” and “healthy” food. Food is just food and it nourishes us in different ways and different foods make our body feel different, some foods give us lots of energy, some foods make us feel really happy because they taste delicious. Even though majority of the time we eat home cooked, or home baked or fresh whole foods and fruits and vegetables, we absolutely still have chips or yoghurt pouches, ice cream, takeaways from time to time and it’s not a big deal. We are also all really big fans of hot chips, so there’s that. But food is there to be shared and enjoyed and the experience of having a fish and chips picnic in the garden together as a family is just as valid and important as a nourishing home cooked meal.

I try to minimise food waste as much as possible but it’s still a work in progress. Our veggie garden has been great as it’s meant we have our own compost so a lot of our food scraps go in there. There’s still a fair bit of waste as we have two young children who often leave kai on their plate, even if it’s just a little bit. We eat a lot of leftovers for lunches and I try to push out our grocery shop as much as possible which often means getting creative to use what we have left in the fridge and pantry.

My relationship growing up with food was rather disconnected really. I had working parents so was kind of raised more on “convenience” food. Muesli bars, packets of chips, store bought biscuits - that kind of thing. We would have a home cooked dinner and sat together at the table every night, which now as an adult, I’m so grateful for. But there never was a real connection to our food. I loved baking as a kid and would bake with my nanny often, again something I’m so grateful for. I definitely grew up with the notion of “healthy” and “unhealthy” or “treat” food which led me to have a lot of guilt about eating certain things in my teenage years and early adulthood, and even still sometimes now. I had eczema as a kid and minor digestive issues and it seems food was never considered as a factor in those.

My journey with food and cooking truly began when I was diagnosed with endometriosis and PCOS when I was 19. It was when I first really became awakened to the role the food we eat has on our health and our body. It sounds silly, but I honestly hadn’t given it that much thought before then. It’s been a long journey of trial and error, restrictive eating and cooking to now just seeing food as nourishment in all of the ways. Nourishment for the body yes, but also for my soul. I tend to cook with whole foods, I make a conscious effort to use as much homegrown or organic produce as possible. I try to cook as seasonally as possible too as that just intuitively feels right, warmer, nourishing foods in winter and fresh, lighter foods in summer. Gone are the days of trying to “plan” a weeks worth of meals, it is now such an intuitive process for me. I tune into what my body and soul is feeling like or what kind of nourishment I can see my family might need. Cooking and baking almost gets me into a meditative state, it is such a big part of our day to day life.

It was my journey with PCOS and endometriosis that really changed my perspective and my relationship to food. I truly believe it was lifestyle and dietary changes and herbal medicine that healed my symptoms of these conditions. A long journey of going too far down the health “rabbit hole” after having no real relationship to food and nourishment as such, and to the point of restrictive eating and guilt and shame around eating certain “bad” foods led me to where I am now. I have gone through phases of trying to meal plan, of following certain diets/lifestyles of trying to fit what I eat into a nice neat tidy “box.” I have a really healthy balanced relationship with food now, viewing it as nourishment, not just for the body but for the soul as well. Enjoying and prioritising the ritual and experience around food as much as the food itself.

We don’t have a set budget as such but we have a window that our food costs tend to fall into if that makes sense. I have found doing a monthly butcher order from a beautiful organic and free range butcher as well a monthly bulk shop order has been wonderful for us. We get a fruit and vegetable box delivery weekly as well and then any extras that fall outside of these deliveries I get from the supermarket. Online shopping has been a godsend for me as a mama of two young boys. Our butcher, bulk shop and fruit and vegetable box gets delivered to our door and we do click and collect groceries which I am sure saves us money as I am a shocker for adding sneaky things we don’t need to the trolley when I shop. We preserved and froze a lot of our own fruit and vegetables this year and our vegetable garden and fruit trees saves us a bit at certain times of the year too. We are so lucky that my parents have a big property with chickens, green house and vegetable garden as well as a few animals raised for meat, all that we have some access to.

I try to be as creative as possible and stretch out meals in ways that are as healthy, nutrient dense and cost effective as I can. Adding lentils and chickpeas to meals is a go-to. But mostly, just keeping it simple. There are very few elaborate, time consuming meals or recipes in our home. It’s simple, home made baking, often adapted to be as nutritious as possible and fitting certain dietary requirements. My son has eczema that is sometimes flared by wheat and dairy, and I’m dairy free also. Whole foods, delicious spices, fresh herbs, easy and simple. Oh the slow cooker is my best friend on those busy days!

I really just try to prioritise three nourishing meals a day for myself, it helps my nervous system regulation, my mental state and overall makes me a happier more peaceful mum. It doesn’t happen every day but that’s what I strive for and time for a cup or two a day of nourishing, medicinal herbal tea.

Rituals around meal times are really important to us. We eat together twice a day at least, when we are all together for lunch we will sit together too. We always say thank you to the person who cooked and thank you to the food on our plate. Our kids are still young, so we’ll often say “thank you veggie garden” or “thank you farmers” or “thank you chicken!” Our own little meal time karakia we sometimes say is, “thank you to our food, please nourish our mind, our bodies and our soul, help us grow big and strong” - our three year old loves saying that. My husband and I often hold our plate and take a couple of deep breaths with our eyes closed before eating just to ground and regulate.

Food is medicine, not just for our bodies and physical health but for our heart and soul too. I don’t want my children to feel shame around food, I want them to know how to eat intuitively and to know that it’s okay to enjoy eating food sometimes for no other reason than it being utterly delicious. Eating, cooking, preparing and growing and caring for our food can be a sacred experience if we slow down and allow it to be. I hope my boys’ childhood experience with food and nourishment allows them to carry that knowledge with them into adulthood.

Food as medicine for our hearts and souls

Home Blog